Why it’s OKAY that you don’t have Everything Figured Out Yet

When I left high school, I experienced a lot of pressure to have everything together. Everyone around me seemed to know exactly what they wanted to do and where they were heading with their lives from the moment they could count to 10. I acted like I did, but I honestly had no idea what I was supposed to do with my life. And since I’ve been out of school for five years… I still have no idea what I’m doing!

Maybe you feel like this, or maybe you know someone who has experienced this. Well, I’m here to tell you that this is completely okay and pretty normal.

It’s All an Act

Let me tell you a little secret. Are you ready? Here it is… no one has their lives figured out at 18! If anyone is convincing you that they have everything together at that age, they are fooling you.

Your early twenties are some of the most trying and uncertain times of your life. This is the phase where you make some of the most important decisions and none of us have a guide showing which way we are supposed to go to end up in the right place.

You might be thinking of someone who seems to have everything handed to them (we all know that one person who seems to have life easy) and say “Well, she clearly has her life in order. And look at this post from her Instagram feed, she’s living the life. I need to step up my game.” And there we see a classic example of how misleading social media can be.

“The path to whatever your notion of success is will likely not be linear. Don’t take continuous personal growth for granted. Just because you’re older doesn’t necessarily mean you’re wiser. Your 20s will be full of failures — let them happen and learn as you go.”

-Holden Desalles

We see only one side of a person’s life and make conclusions. Often we feel inferior because our lives are dull in comparison to the beautiful feeds of our peers. But no matter how wonderful their lives are depicted online, everyone has issues and struggles. That’s just how life works! Even though it doesn’t seem like it, all of them have to make similar tough decisions about their futures and work through personal stuff.

I think it’s really important to take others off of that pedestal to get a true view of your circumstances and remove some of that unnecessary pressure.

Focus on You

This is a time when you have to figure out what you want out of life and it’s a gift. Later in your life, you won’t have the luxury of all this time you have now. You will maybe have a significant other and a family and/ or a career to focus on.

I’m not saying you can’t make big life changes later on if you realize you want something different out of life, because you totally can! There are so many inspirational people out there who took their lives in a different direction when they were well past their twenties. Just think of J.K. Rowling (the writer of the Harry Potter novels if you didn’t know), who is by far one of my favorite inspirational stories of how it’s never too late to chase after your dreams. But it’s often a lot harder if you choose to take that path, so use this time you have now.

I think we all would do a lot better if we started to view these uncertain times as a blessing rather than a curse. Don’t you want to make that switch? Don’t you want to see this time as a time where you can develop and grow?

If you’re still in this phase, enjoy it, embrace it, and learn to love the adventure that comes along with the uncertainty.

Article by
Katia Theron